Desperate Desperado - The Story of Laguna Loire
by Uncle Laguna
Summary: This is the story of everyone's favorite soldier, Laguna Loire, beginning at the first dream sequence before the Timber mission and ending with the final cinema.
1. Timber and the Galbadia Hotel

Desperate Desperado:  
  
The Story of Laguna Loire  
  
Part I:  
  
Timber and the Deling City Hotel  
  
  
  
"Uhh, Laguna, are you sure this is the right way?" asked the tall, skinny man in the Galbadian uniform with two long braids down his back.  
  
The leader of the squad, a slightly shorter man with shoulder blade-length black hair, continued running forward on the path through the forest, basically ignoring his companion's question.  
  
In the back of the squad, the tallest and largest man followed silently, his hair hidden beneath the blue bandanna he wore on his head.  
  
To the right of the path, parts of the forest were on fire even as the squad leader took them dangerously close to the fires. Luckily, they had been able to avoid detection by and combat with Timber's army, which was supposedly huge enough to directly invade Esthar and win.  
  
Suddenly, an odd, bell-shaped monster leapt out in front of them. It was a Funguar, one of the many weak monsters that inhabited the huge forests around Timber.  
  
Green orbs circled around it which marked the summoning of magic as it attacked with a burst of Fire against Laguna. He swatted the fire off of his uniform and then brought his machine gun back up to the ready.  
  
Before they could react, the Funguar shot off another Fire attack at the large man, who used his hand and his anchor to beat back the fire.  
  
The skinny man ran forward with his punching blades in hand, bringing up first the blade in his left hand as he spun and then slashed upward with the right-hand blade.  
  
In retaliation, the Funguar turned toward the skinny man and launched off another magic attack. A large orange star appeared by the man's left foot and circled around his body as it traveled upward. As it reached the top of his head, it scattered into several smaller stars which fell to the ground and dissipated as the attack successfully put him to sleep.  
  
Laguna brought his left hand around and up to his forehead, then pulled a concentrated high-explosive grenade from his belt, pulled the pin out with his teeth, and threw it out toward the Funguar. It bounced twice as Laguna leapt into the air, grabbing a cable in his left hand as his momentum started him swinging, aiming his machine gun down as he opened fire on the Funguar. High-density bullets shot out of the barrel as the used cartridges shot out the side of his gun and small explosions from the bullets covered the battlefield, most of them hitting the Funguar. As his machine gun's magazine emptied, he dropped back to the ground with his back to the Funguar, then stood up and turned just as the grenade exploded, blasting the monster apart.  
  
Then, as the group continued running, the big man in the back, Ward, said, "Hoo-boy, not again..."  
  
Just about that time, they reached a Draw Point and Laguna instructed Ward to stock Cure magic. Ward received one Cure from the Draw Point, then they moved past it and continued on.  
  
The path eventually turned to run parallel to a small stream with a fallen log as the only bridge over it. Laguna led them to the log and then crossed it.  
  
After crossing the stream, the path widened out a bit and appeared to be a bit well-traveled.  
  
"Hey, aren't we here to fight a war?" Ward asked. "You know, against the almighty Timber army?"  
  
The skinny man, Kiros, tapped a finger against his chin as he pondered his companion's words. "Yeah, so why are we wasting our time messin' with these animals?"  
  
Laguna turned around and scratched absently at the back of his head. "Well, you see... It's just that, uhh..."  
  
"Don't tell me we're lost again," Kiros said flatly, crossing his arms.  
  
Laguna turned around again. "Anyway... We're goin' home. Deling City, here we come!"  
  
With that, he ran up the path toward their army vehicle. Kiros followed behind him as Ward said, "W-Wait! Laguna!"  
  
He quickly ran to catch up with the others.  
  
Up ahead on the path, the Galbadian army vehicle effectively blocked the path, yet its rear doors were open, a welcome sight to the soldiers. They quickly piled into it and Kiros closed the doors as Laguna jumped into the driver's seat and turned the wheel hard to the right, driving the vehicle down the path.  
  
---  
  
In Deling City, Laguna swerved the vehicle toward a fountain in the middle of the lane, stopping about five feet from it, clearly intending to leave it in the middle of traffic.  
  
"H-Hey!" Ward exclaimed. "You can't park in the middle of the street!"  
  
Laguna looked back over his shoulder, waving his hand dismissively. "Chill man, it's cool."  
  
The three of them piled out of the car, taking in the slightly-polluted air of Galbadia's capital city as Laguna looked around. "Alright then!" he said. "How's about a drink?"  
  
Kiros sighed and rolled his eyes. "We're not just here for the booze, are we? We've got a war to fight."  
  
Ward chuckled. "So we'll get smashed, and then we'll CHAAARGE!"  
  
Laguna turned toward the two of them. "Kiros, Ward, you two seem to misunderstand. I just want to have a friendly drink with you two."  
  
As they started to run off toward the Galbadia Hotel, one of the trolley- buses came screeching to a halt behind their vehicle, as well as a civilian car, blocked by the army vehicle.  
  
Only two people were around on the street the Galbadia Hotel was on, and they were both soldiers. The far end of the road was blocked by yet another army vehicle, most likely the same one that had passed them at the station.  
  
"Hey, Laguna, you back to see her again?" the soldier across the street from the hotel shouted.  
  
Laguna ignored him as he walked to the front doors of the hotel.  
  
"Got the hots for the pianist in the hotel bar?" the soldier by the doors asked.  
  
Laguna grumbled and walked inside, Kiros and Ward behind him. Once inside, he went immediately toward the stairs on the right of the lobby, heading down the stairs toward the bar down below.  
  
"Welcome!" said the barmaid. "Your usual table is ready."  
  
"Thanks," Laguna said, nodding, as he walked over to the table, preceded by Kiros and Ward. "At ease, men."  
  
At that, the three of them sat down. Laguna looked to his right, then stood up again and turned toward them. "We're goin' all out tonight, right boys!?" Then he sat down again.  
  
The barmaid walked up to their table and asked, "May I take your order?"  
  
Laguna looked over at her, resting his hands on his knees. "The usual!"  
  
"Me, too," Kiros said without looking up, arms crossed.  
  
"Keep 'em coming!" Ward said, chuckling.  
  
Unknown to the three soldiers at the table, a petite woman wearing a curve- hugging red dress was making her way down the stairs and toward the piano.  
  
"So, Laguna..." Ward said, having noticed the woman. "Julia should be making her appearance soon. You goin' for it tonight?"  
  
Kiros seemed to close in even more on himself, if that were possible. "Yeah, go for it."  
  
Laguna had seen her, too. He slouched on the seat and shook his head, sighing a bit. "What-ever, man! Can't you see she's working?"  
  
Kiros frowned as he looked at Laguna. "Don't go back on your word. C'mon, go wave to her."  
  
Laguna looked down at the ground. "Give me a break..." he said depressively.  
  
Ward looked over at him. "So you say, but we know you'll do it."  
  
Grumbling, Laguna stood up and walked toward the stage that the woman, Julia, sat playing the piano on. Laguna walked to the edge of the first step, then stopped. He stood there as she played, smiling in appreciation of her beautiful song as he tilted his head slightly to the side. As she stopped, he looked down, then turned and took a few steps away.  
  
He then nodded to himself, turned back, and walked up onto the stage. IAhh, to be this close to Julia.../I he thought to himself. I...Uh- oh.../I he thought as she turned her head slightly to look at him. IMy leg's cramping up...!/I  
  
He jerked back suddenly, grabbing his right leg in his hands and almost bending over as the pain shot through his body. He stood up again, then began to limp rather pathetically back to his table. But he turned back around halfway there and limped back up onto the stage, waved at Julia, then limped back to his table.  
  
"Good work, Laguna," Kiros said as he reached the table.  
  
"Mission successful!" Ward exclaimed happily.  
  
"Here, have a seat," Kiros offered, sliding over a bit to make room.  
  
Muttering, Laguna sat back down, his posture looking even more depressed than before.  
  
"I didn't think you'd actually do it," Ward said, trying to make Laguna feel better. "Our popularity rating's gone up a point."  
  
Kiros, not really the sympathetic type, said, "Yeah, but you cut a pretty pathetic figure up there. I'd say you're about a -3 on the manliness scale."  
  
"Say what you want!" Laguna burst out, his voice betraying his sadness and his anger. He sighed dreamily, then said, "Julia sure is pretty..."  
  
Kiros looked up suddenly, something having caught his attention from the corner of his eye. "Aaa..."  
  
Ward looked up as well, having seen the same thing. "Hunhh...?"  
  
"Laguna, we're takin' off," Kiros said quickly.  
  
Laguna jumped to his feet as Kiros and Ward stood up. "H-Hey! What's the rush?"  
  
Ward looked back as he and Kiros began walking away. "It's on us tonight. Relax and stay awhile, Laguna."  
  
He then quickly departed.  
  
As Laguna stood there wondering what had made his friends run off so fast, Julia stepped up silently behind him. "May I?" she asked with her soft voice, which seemed so beautiful to Laguna.  
  
He whirled around, startled. "Aaaaa..." Quickly, he turned and limped to the other side of the table, leaving her plenty of room.  
  
She stepped in behind the table, then tilted her head to the side and smiled, bringing her left hand up to her face with her right arm beneath her elbow. "Did I interrupt anything?"  
  
"N-N-N-Not at all," Laguna answered quickly, his stuttering painfully apparent. He brought his hands behind his back at parade rest, trying to regain some composure. He didn't do a very good job. "P-Please, s-sit down."  
  
He did so himself, instantly lost in thought. IOh man, oh man, it's really HER! What do I do!? Kiros? Ward? HELP! What do I say!? But man, she is pretty.../I  
  
Julia giggled and then sat down, looking over at Laguna. "You ok now?"  
  
Laguna nodded, looking up. "Kind of..."  
  
"How's your leg?"  
  
He sat up slightly, confused. "L-Leg? Oh, this!? Y-Yeah, it's fine. Happens all the time when I get nervous." He coughed in emphasis.  
  
"Were you nervous?" she asked, looking down at her hands in her lap.  
  
He looked up and rolled his eyes, chuckling. "Oh yeah. I'm still kinda..."  
  
Her head tilted up a bit. "You can relax. You don't have to get nervous around me."  
  
"Oh, sorry," he said, looking back down again.  
  
She looked over at him. "Say..." Her voice dropped to a whisper before she continued. "Would you like to talk somewhere private? I have a room here..."  
  
Laguna instantly shot to his feet. "I-In your room!?"  
  
Julia blushed as she looked out at the other patrons of the bar; Kiros, Ward, two Galbadian soldiers, and the barmaid. "Well..." She started to whisper again. "It's pretty hard to talk freely here. Everyone's listening in." As she said, everyone in the bar was standing within earshot of the table. "If you'd like to, please come by. I've been wanting to talk to you... You don't want to?"  
  
Laguna swept his right hand out to the side as he said, "Of course I do!"  
  
Julia stood up and smiled at him, then said, "Then I'll go ahead and wait for you. Ask for my room at the front desk, ok?"  
  
Then she turned and left.  
  
IAm I dreaming?/I he thought to himself. INo, this can't be a dream! Julia...? Wants to talk to me...? And just the two of us! Get it together Laguna... I always screw up by talking about myself too much. It's always been like that. But not tonight! I'm all ears for Julia!/I He nodded. IAhh, time to use my manly charm and help Julia with her problem./I  
  
He immediately moved toward the stairs, not even pausing to talk to Kiros and Ward on his way.  
  
Back in the lobby, he turned to the receptionist, who said, "Welcome! Checking in?"  
  
"Whi-Whi-Which..." he began.  
  
"...Aah, Mr. Laguna Loire? I've been expecting you. Let me show you to Ms. Julia's room."  
  
---  
  
A knock sounded on the door. Her breath catching, Julia looked in the mirror once more to check her hair before opening the door and smiling at Laguna before motioning with her hand to enter.  
  
"Thanks for coming," she said.  
  
Laguna lifted his right arm, palm up, in a shrug. "No... Not at all, uh... Thank you for inviting me."  
  
She smiled and tilted her head to the side, then said, "Have a seat."  
  
Nodding, he walked over to the bed and sat down. Then it seemed as though he had been hit physically and he jumped back up, walking quickly to the other side of the room as Julia watched, giggling silently, as he sat down in a chair. Then he decided that was a bad idea as well and stood up, walking back toward the door.  
  
"Going so soon?" Julia asked, suppressing a giggle by putting her hand to her lips. "We haven't even talked yet."  
  
Laguna took several steps back and then turned toward her. "No, it's not that. It's just that I'm a big fan of yours, so I'm really kinda nervous, y'know?"  
  
She clasped her hands together at her waist, then smiled. "So that's why you come to hear me play so often."  
  
Again, Laguna seemed as though he had been physically shoved backwards. "You... You saw me?" He ran to the other side of the room and began pacing back and forth, acting as though he was on the verge of a nervous breakdown.  
  
Julia nodded. "You were always smiling while listening, right?" She walked to the desk and tilted her head to the side and smiled, bringing her left hand up to her face with her right arm beneath her elbow as he stopped pacing. "You have beautiful eyes. Though they look a bit scared now." She lowered her arms and turned to look at him. "Don't worry, I'm not going to pluck 'em and eat 'em," she said, effectively ruining the romantic mood that had been present before. "I just want to talk, gazing into those eyes. Would you like a drink? Wine perhaps?"  
  
"I must be dreamin'..." Laguna said, mostly to himself.  
  
---  
  
Only a few minutes later, Laguna was already going off with the mouth. "Yeah, I don't like fightin' too much," he said, "but you get to travel, y'know? Seeing new places n' stuff. And it's fun, 'cause Kiros and Ward are always with me. Hey, we should all go out drinkin' sometime! Whaddya say? And, uh... What was I talkin' about? Oh yeah, so I want to quit the army and become a journalist! So I can tell people 'bout all the things I've seen on my travels. So, like, the other day, one of my articles made the reader's column. Pretty cool, huh? Yeah, that was way cool..."  
  
"I'm happy for you," Julia said with a nod as she sat on the edge of the bed, actually interested in what Laguna was saying, if not the slightly less than coherent way in which he said it.  
  
"Yikes... I'm talkin' too much again," he said, picking up on her subtle message. He took a step closer to her. "Tell me about yourself. Like...your dreams for the future."  
  
She stood up and crossed to the other side of the room as Laguna walked to the nearest wall.  
  
"I...I want to sing," she said hesitantly. "Not just play the piano, but sing, too."  
  
Laguna lifted up his arms as though he'd just heard the best news of his life. "Oh, I'd really love to hear it!"  
  
"But I can't... I'm no good at writing lyrics."  
  
Laguna walked to the other side of the desk and crossed his arms, pondering on that thought. "Hmm... That must be tough."  
  
Julia turned around and looked at Laguna's back. "But thanks to you, I think I can come up with something."  
  
He turned around to look at her, bringing his right hand up to his chest. "Thanks to me...?"  
  
"Yes," she said, nodding. "The many faces you've shown me. Times when you were hurt, worried... Or felt pain deep inside you... Your smile, your face, your eyes..." She began to walk toward him. "You've shown me something..." she said as she stopped in front of him. "I think I can come up with a song."  
  
"Wow..." Laguna said. "I must be dreamin'..."  
  
Julia took his right hand and lifted it up, then pulled off his glove and gently kissed the back of his hand. "It's not a dream, is it?"  
  
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door.  
  
"Laguna!" Kiros said from outside. "New orders! Meet by the Presidential Residence, on the double!"  
  
They heard his footsteps leading the other way.  
  
Julia looked up at Laguna, her eyes shining. "Can we meet again?"  
  
Laguna looked down at her, smiling his best smile. "Of course! I have to come hear you sing!" 


	2. Esthar's Secret

Desperate Desperado:  
  
The Story of Laguna Loire  
  
Part II:  
  
Esthar's Secret  
  
The downward incline overlooked...something... Whatever it was, finding out about it was their mission objective. Laguna stood on the path at the top of the hill, looking down at it and wondering what it was.  
  
Kiros and Ward came up and stood a few feet back from Laguna, turning to discuss it with each other.  
  
"Kiros, you sure this is the place?" Ward asked, crossing his arms.  
  
"Positive," Kiros answered, tapping his fingers against his chin.  
  
"I don't want to be patrolling the wrong place, like last time," Ward said.  
  
Laguna turned around and put his hand to the back of his head. "Ahh, sorry... This ain't the place."  
  
Kiros and Ward both shook their heads; they knew he was lying. Kiros crossed his arms. "This is it. Let's go, commander."  
  
Laguna looked at him questioningly, then turned around and pulled out the map, looking it over. He then put it away, turned back around, and said, "I brought the wrong map." He turned back around and looked at the thing, butterflies beginning to flap around in his stomach. "Somehow, I have a bad feeling about this... Seriously, I have a BAAAD feeling...! There's somethin' fishy goin' on here! You know what the old folks say... The unfamiliar always happens..."  
  
Kiros raised an eyebrow. "You mean...'unexpected', right?"  
  
"You only got the 'un' part right," Ward said.  
  
"Aah, shut up! Stop your clamorin' and make sure all your gear's equipped. Now, let's move out!"  
  
Kiros and Ward moved forward to catch up with him, then the three of them ran down the hill toward the target, Kiros and Ward noting the odd way in which Laguna ran.  
  
---  
  
The catwalk split off into two branches, one apparently leading to a ladder and the other going off farther than they could see. Coming from the right and below the catwalk, a conveyor belt of some kind carried rocks and other debris up and past the left of the catwalk.  
  
The group ran to where the catwalk branched off and Laguna stopped, scratching at the back of his head. "But seriously... This place sure is strange. What the heck is this big pile of rocks? You think these are natural rocks used for carving tombstones?"  
  
Kiros took a step forward and crossed his arms. "Who knows...or cares?"  
  
Ward took a step forward as well and also crossed his arms. "Speaking of strange... Why have you been...running around so strange?"  
  
Laguna turned around to look at Ward. "Strange...? What do you mean strange? ...Just bein' cautious. That's the basic rule of thu..."  
  
A sound of something landing on the catwalk behind him caused Laguna to turn around. "...Hey?"  
  
A soldier came running down the catwalk and stopped just inside the cavern.  
  
"Looks like we've got company," Laguna said. "Esthar soldiers. Still wearing those flashy uniforms."  
  
Another sound drew Kiros' attention backwards as two more soldiers ran up to surround them on the narrow catwalk. Ward spun around as the second soldier ran up. "Laguna...!!!"  
  
Laguna, who was still facing the first soldier, said, "Don't be such a weenie!" He turned around as a fourth soldier ran up with the other two facing Kiros and Ward. "What the...!?"  
  
The soldier who was now behind Laguna took that opportunity to attack.  
  
The soldier lifted up his strange weapon that looked like the fabled pendulum from Edgar Allen Poe's "The Pit and the Pendulum" but it also had three holes that looked like gun barrels on the grip. The soldier held up the weapon toward Ward and fired out a scatter shot, and Ward whirled around to face the new threat.  
  
Kiros turned around and stood straight, then ran forward with his punching blades in hand, slashing up first the blade in his left hand as he spun and then slashed upward with the right-hand blade. The status attack junction on Kiros' punching blades put the soldier to sleep.  
  
Laguna jumped forward and fired a tri-burst from his machine gun, catching the soldier in a critical area. The soldier dropped to his knees and then collapsed onto the ground, dead.  
  
Kiros, his punching blades laid on the catwalk in front of him, put his hand to his face. "Wasn't our mission just to patrol...?"  
  
"Why does it have to turn out like this?" Ward asked, holding up his anchor with one hand.  
  
Laguna scratched at the back of his head. "Seriously...! I wasn't expecting this at all!"  
  
Then the three Esthar soldiers attacked. One soldier ran up to Laguna and leapt into the air, bringing his strange weapon slashing down at Laguna. The Galbadian soldier lifted up his machine gun to ward off the attack as the enemy retreated. The soldier in the rear fired a scatter shot at Laguna.  
  
Kiros ran toward the soldier who hadn't attacked yet and slashed at him with his punching blades, putting the soldier to sleep. Ward lifted up his anchor and drew his arm back, then hurled it at the same soldier Kiros had attacked, impaling that soldier.  
  
Ward ran forward to retrieve his anchor from the dead soldier as Laguna jumped forward and fired a tri-burst at the soldier who had hit him with scatter shot. The soldier stumbled back and dropped to a knee, shot in the leg and one arm.  
  
The first soldier ran up to Laguna and slashed at him again, opening up an angry wound on Laguna's right arm. Kiros ran to the soldier Laguna attacked and slashed at him with a vengeance, one of the sharp punching blades stabbing through an ammunition pack and sparking up an explosion, which did no harm to Kiros but killed the soldier.  
  
Ward threw his anchor at the last soldier and as he ran forward to retrieve it, Laguna fired a tri-burst of cover fire at the soldier, his shots putting the soldier to a knee. Kiros ran forward to finish the soldier, his punching blades stabbing through the enemy's heart and left lung.  
  
Ward had put his anchor away when he squinted into the distance and saw more Esthar soldiers approaching. "There's more coming?"  
  
Kiros slipped his punching blades back into the sheaths on his hips. "There's no end to this!"  
  
"Better make a run for it," Laguna said.  
  
Ward and Kiros hastily agreed, and the three of them turned and ran down the branch of the catwalk that lead to the ladder. "Huh...? It's a ladder. Guys, it's a ladder. Looks like it leads down."  
  
Laguna climbed down first, then Kiros, then Ward brought up the rear. The ladder led them down to another catwalk, this time with odd blue rocks on the left and with machinery to the right.  
  
Laguna began to run down the catwalk, but only got a few feet before his right leg tensed up and pain shot through him. "Ooou...cH!"  
  
Ward took a step toward him. "What's wrong?" he asked flatly, assuming the answer already.  
  
"My...leg...cramped up!!!" Laguna screamed.  
  
Kiros turned toward him and crossed his arms, shaking his head slowly.  
  
Laguna stood up a minute later. "Phew... It's fine now! I'm so out of shape. Gotta stretch before I exercise..."  
  
Ward chuckled as he brought his arms back down to his side. "That last battle we had doesn't really count as exercise."  
  
Laguna turned around. "...What? D'ya say something?"  
  
Kiros side and dropped his arms to his sides as well. "...Ahh, no."  
  
Shrugging, Laguna turned around to keep running down the catwalk, until another battle began.  
  
An Esthar soldier dropped onto the catwalk from above, holding his shotblade at the ready. As Ward prepared to throw his harpoon at the soldier, the soldier ran forward and slashed down at Laguna. Ward hurled his harpoon at the soldier, and as he ran forward to retrieve it, Kiros came up from the other side and slashed with his katals, cutting easily through the soldier's armor and eviscerating him.  
  
After putting away their weapons, they continued running down the catwalk until they reached the end and another path led into the blue rocks. As they entered, it seemed that there was a clear-cut path through here.  
  
There was a pile of rubble near by, and something in it caught Laguna's attention. He walked over to the pile to begin rummaging around in it. But before he got there, another Esthar soldier attacked. Laguna took a step forward and fired a tri-burst with his machine gun, killing the soldier instantly.  
  
Shaking his head, Laguna put away his gun and knelt down near the pile. Something shiny caught his eye.  
  
(Hmm? What's this...?)  
  
He reached over and picked it up. It was an old key. Slipping it in his back pocket, he turned to continue going.  
  
(I feel a draft... on my butt...)  
  
"......! T...There's a hole in my back pocket!!!"  
  
He began feeling around for the key, but couldn't find it again. (Can't find it... Ahh well, it's not like I'm gonna die.)  
  
The gang continued running down the tunnel. They crossed over a small ditch in the ground and thought nothing of it as they continued going. The next section of tunnel had three wide panels in the floor. As they crossed over the center one, they heard a distinct clicking sound, but they ignored it for the time being.  
  
The ceiling of the tunnel dropped down drastically until it was only a few feet higher than they were tall. A broken piece of wood caught Laguna's attention for some reason and he began to rummage around it.  
  
(Hmm? What's this...?)  
  
He picked it up. Another key. Or was it the same key?  
  
(This time... It's in my shirt pocket...so HA!)  
  
"Ah... Ahhh... ACHOO!" He sneezed powerfully, and the key clinked as it rebounded off the wall and disappeared. "NOOOO!!! Not again!?"  
  
Again, he looked around for it, but couldn't find it. (Can't find it...)  
  
"Oh, well..." he said. "Nothing cheaper than something free."  
  
Kiros crossed his arms. "Nothing cheaper..."  
  
"...Than something free?" Ward finished.  
  
Laguna turned toward them and scratched the back of his head. "...What? Is it something I said? C'mon... Let's go."  
  
The tunnel continued for about ten feet before it ended and a ladder led up. The gang climbed up the ladder and onto a series of catwalks. The catwalk they had come out on had a circular catwalk leading around the hole to the lower level, and further down had two other catwalks branching from it. Even from their distance, Laguna could tell the branch to his right was blocked off, but saw the draw point on the other branch and ran toward it.  
  
Suddenly a special operations Esthar soldier dropped down in front of them and threw his sword like a boomerang, hitting all three of them. In retaliation, Laguna fired a tri-burst from his machine gun and stepped back as Ward prepared to hurl his harpoon at the soldier.  
  
But before he could, the soldier ran forward and attacked Laguna, slashing at him with the shotblade and then backflipping away. Ward picked up his harpoon and threw it at the soldier, who stumbled back as both Kiros and Ward ran up, Ward to retrieve his harpoon and Kiros to attack with his katals.  
  
The soldier fell back and collapsed on his side as Laguna prepared to cover Kiros' retreat, but it wasn't necessary.  
  
Still holding his machine gun in case of another enemy attack, Laguna ran down the branched catwalk and toward the draw point. As he'd anticipated, another enemy dropped down in front of them, a regular soldier this time.  
  
Ward picked up his harpoon and threw it at the soldier, and as he ran back with it, the soldier held up his shotblade to clear the gun barrels' line of fire. He shot a burst at Laguna, who was largely unaffected by it save for a little melee damage.  
  
Kiros slashed at the soldier with his katals and Laguna covered his retreat with a tri-burst, which put the soldier out of commission.  
  
After finally reaching the draw point, Laguna drew 15 Confuses. He waited a few moments, then came back and drew eight more. He then returned to the ladder and began to run around the circular catwalk, only to be attacked by a spec ops soldier.  
  
The soldier lifted his shotblade and fired it at Laguna, dealing substantially more damage this time than when the regular soldier hit him. In retaliation, Laguna ran forward and fired a tri-burst, and Kiros ran up immediately after the covering fire and slashed viciously with his katals, leaving grievous wounds behind. Ward threw his harpoon at the soldier, impaling him.  
  
The group finished circling the catwalk and then went back down on the ladder.  
  
This time when they passed over the middle floor panel, Laguna knelt down to inspect the clicking sound. "Hmm...? The lever on the hatch is loose... ......!!! I know! If we use this... Some stubborn Esthar fool won't be able to come after us!"  
  
Kiros walked past Laguna to stand on the panel in the direction they had been heading, then turned back and crossed his arms. "What the heck are you up to?"  
  
Ward ran over and stood to the side of Kiros, effectively trapping Laguna. "Somethin' stupid again, I bet."  
  
Laguna turned toward Ward and pointed at him. "You guys... You're gonna regret sayin' that. They say, one who makes fun of a genius will end up cryin' in the end."  
  
"?" Kiros was totally confused.  
  
"...So who's the...genius...?" Ward asked with a chuckle.  
  
"Erghhhhhh! Just shut up! ANYWAY! The lever for this hatch is broken. So if we just loosen it a bit more..."  
  
"When they come after us from that side and..." Kiros trailed off, thinking.  
  
"YES! Youuu guessed it! They'll walk over it without expecting a thing! Then, all of a sudden, WHOOPS! ...And down they go." Laguna took a proud stance and laughed. "I have to admit... I really am a genius."  
  
"Hah," Ward said. "...Like the Esthar soldiers are really gonna fall for this trap."  
  
"We won't know until we try!" Laguna said, pointing at Ward. "And those who never try will never know! So... I'm gonna do it! Just remember, if we tamper with the lever, we won't be able to make it back to the other side. It'd be idiotic to fall for our own trap... So, here it goes." He walked over to the lever and knelt down. "You guys, stand back."  
  
Kiros and Ward gladly obliged, expecting his messing with that lever to cause the panel that they were standing on to give in. Or something stupid like that. You could never tell with Laguna...  
  
Laguna tugged at the lever until it came up in his hand. He set it off to the side, then stood up and walked toward Kiros and Ward. "There!"  
  
The three of them continued running down the tunnel.  
  
Behind them, an Esthar soldier was running up to chase and attack them. The soldier ran right over the tampered panel. Suddenly, the panel dropped out from beneath him, dropping him into a fairly deep hole.  
  
Laguna led them toward the shallow ditch, when another soldier attacked. The soldier ran at Kiros and slashed down with the shotblade. In angry retaliation, Kiros slashed with a vengeance at the soldier, actually managing to lop his head off. [Kiros and Laguna level up, GF Siren learns Treatment, Move-Find set as new ability]  
  
The gang just barely got over the ditch before they were attacked once again. But the enemy this time was not a soldier, but an odd monster with a blue, bulbous body and odd rubbery arms and legs [Gesper]. Using telekenetic power, the monster lifted Laguna and inverted him, then dropped him to the ground.  
  
After righting himself, Laguna fired a tri-burst at the monster, his status junctioning afflicting the monster with Zombie. Kiros ran forward and slashed with his katals, and Ward threw his harpoon afterward.  
  
Before Laguna's next move the monster, curiously enough, casted Cure on Kiros. Though puzzled by this helpful move by the enemy, Laguna threw out a Phoenix Down at the monster, hoping to take advantage of the monster's Zombied status. However, he learned that Phoenix Downs don't work on Zombied monsters. Kiros went in for another attack with his katals, and Ward decided to use magic this time, as his harpoon hadn't done a lot of damage to the monster.  
  
Just as he decided to cast Cura on it, the monster casted Float on him, causing him to levitate in the air. [Regen status becomes nullified] Just in case Ward's magic doesn't work, Laguna was selecting a Hi-Potion to use against the monster, while Kiros chose to attack physically.  
  
Ward lifted up his harpoon and swung it over his head as green orbs circled him, then brought his harpoon under his arm. Three green rings of healing power circled around the monster, doing damage to it rather than healing it. It threw its arms up in the air, then dropped them to its side and collapsed backward. [Ward levels up]  
  
The gang heads back toward the tunnel entrance, but turns and runs up a slight incline to a side tunnel. When the path levels out, they are in a cavern that has two exits, and a large hole in the ground with a rock next to it. Heading past the rock, Laguna leads the group into the exit nearest it. Before they reached the exit, another Esthar soldier attacked.  
  
Kiros ran forward, slashing upward with his left katal and back downward with his right katal. This effect killed the soldier outright.  
  
The tunnel again went up slightly and another, larger, rock was on the side of the path. This time there was an odd object on the ground as well. Laguna ran over to it and looked at it.  
  
"The heck's this? A blue and red switch, and 2 fuses...?  
  
Kiros crossed his arms. "A detonator...? You know."  
  
Laguna turned toward him and crossed his arms too. "Ohhh, I get it. The short fuse is for that boulder..." He pointed to the big boulder that Ward stood beside. "And the long red fuse is for the boulder further down?"  
  
Ward looked at the boulder beside him, then scratched his head. "Hey, man...! Are you crazy!? You don't even know how powerful that thing will be!"  
  
Laguna waved off his protests. "Ahh, I bet it's not all that. The detonator's right here, so as long as we stay behind it, we'll be all right."  
  
Ward crossed his arms. "Well... I guess so..."  
  
Laguna turned and looked at the two detonators. "Let's see... What to do..." After a moment's thought, he knelt down and pressed the red switch. He then stood and turned to Kiros and Ward. "The bomb blast won't reach us here. Just stay put." But contrary to his declaration, a massive explosion shook the ground, loosing dust from up high to fall down on their heads. "W-W-W-What!?"  
  
Down below, the boulder rolled down into the hole beside it. It rolled across the ditch that the crew had crossed a few times, an Esthar soldier running ahead of it and trying to escape. But the hole on the opposite end of the ditch proved too short and the boulder stopped in its tracks.  
  
Ward had ran up from the blast and was now standing behind Laguna.  
  
"That was...awfully loud," Kiros said with a hint of scorn in his voice, arms crossed.  
  
"Lucky we were here," Ward replied.  
  
"That's what I told you before!" Laguna exclaimed, trying to cover for his idiocy. "You should always check how powerful the thing could be..."  
  
Ward crossed his arms. "Wasn't that...me, who said that?"  
  
Laguna turned toward him and scratched his head. "...Uh...Ah...Hm... Anyway, we're all still alive, right!?" He turned around and looked at the detonator again, then pressed the blue switch. He turned and looked back at Kiros and Ward. "It's gonna blow! Run for it!!!"  
  
They needn't have been told twice. All three of them hauled ass up the incline and onto the stairs at the end. Yet all they heard was that of a little tap.  
  
The boulder dislodged from its position and rolled down the incline, falling into a groove in the floor that led to the hole where the first boulder had been. Two Esthar soldiers fled from its path, one running to each other way out of the cavern. But the boulder lodged in the hole and stayed put.  
  
"That was...awfully quiet," Kiros said confusedly as they walked back down the stairs.  
  
"I was expecting a blast of some sort..." Ward agreed as they reached the bottom.  
  
"See!" Laguna said. "I told you! It wasn't all that powerful!"  
  
Without further comment, the group ran back up the stairs and onto a long pathway. The rocks in this area were no longer a bluish color but were now light red, almost pink. They were successfully able to cross the pathway until the end, when an Esthar soldier appeared. Taking initiative, the soldier fired his shotblade at Laguna. [Limit level reached]  
  
Laguna ran forward in retaliation and fired a tri-burst, taking out the soldier quickly. [GF Ifrit learns Str+40%, GF Diablos learns ST Mag-RF, Ammo-RF set as new ability for GF Ifrit, HP-J set as new ability for GF Diablos]  
  
The next path curved upward and had a small niche off on the left side with a boulder in it. Laguna ran toward the boulder and looked at it, something odd catching his eye. He touched the boulder and it began rolling away. "Hghh...!?"  
  
He just barely saw as a pair of Esthar soldiers were caught by the boulder and crushed beneath it.  
  
"Phew, that was close..." he said.  
  
"Geez..." Ward said. "You have to go around touching everything like a little kid, don't you?"  
  
"Chill out a little, will ya...?" Kiros agreed.  
  
Laguna whirled around. "WHATEVER-MAN! Thanks to ME, those Esthar soldiers and that rock are history. It's like killing two pigs with one stone. I am just so awesome... Genius, I tell you..."  
  
Ward suppressed a laugh. "Pigs...?"  
  
"Don't you mean...birds?" Kiros asked.  
  
Shrugging it off, Laguna ran up the path and around the curve, into the next cavern. [Saved at save point]  
  
In the tunnel to the left, there was a stairway leading up. They turned and ran up the stairway.  
  
Now they were out in the open air again, on the edge of a cliff. The ocean stretched out far in front of them, as far as they could see. They ran to the edge of the cliff, and Laguna was about to say something when he heard Esthar soldiers running up behind them.  
  
"Don't tell me..." he began.  
  
Kiros ran to the side a few feet and faced the soldiers. "Of all the worst possible..."  
  
Ward ran to the middle and turned around. "...Predicaments?"  
  
These soldiers weren't just any Estharian soldiers. They were the elite of the elite, known only as 'Soul Crushers' for their unique attack.  
  
The Soul Crusher on the left ran toward Laguna, slashing down at him with the shotblade and then jumping away. Kiros retaliated against that soldier, slashing at him with katals. In a continuation of the attack, Ward hurled his harpoon at the soldier.  
  
Laguna brought his left hand around and up to his forehead, then pulled a concentrated high-explosive grenade from his belt, pulled the pin out with his teeth, and threw it out toward the Soul Crushers. It bounced twice as Laguna leapt into the air, grabbing a cable in his left hand as his momentum started him swinging, aiming his machine gun down as he opened fire on the Soul Crushers. High-density bullets shot out of the barrel as the used cartridges shot out the side of his gun and small explosions from the bullets covered the battlefield, most of them hitting the Soul Crushers. As his machine gun's magazine emptied, he dropped back to the ground with his back to the Soul Crushers, then stood up and turned just as the grenade exploded, heavily damaging the soldiers.  
  
The Soul Crusher on the left was killed outright, but the one on the right managed to get off Soul Crush against both Kiros and Ward. [HP reduced to 1] With that, the Soul Crusher fell over and died. [No EXP received]  
  
Laguna dragged his friends to the cliff's edge and dropped them to the ground, then collapsed himself. "Look, the ocean... We're saved! Lady Luck is on our side! We can escape to Galbadia!!!"  
  
Kiros twitched. "One would say we've been run down... That's what they'd normally say..."  
  
Laguna forced himself to his feet and looked down at Kiros. "Don't say that. It might come true. Didn't your grandmother tell you that?"  
  
Kiros looked up as Laguna walked to the edge of the cliff. "...If you say something bad... It will come true... Yeah, I think she did."  
  
Ward pushed himself up slightly and barely lifted his head. "Ggghh...rrrhhh..."  
  
Laguna turned toward him. "What'd you say?"  
  
Kiros lifted his head as well, feeling his strength fading away. "I think...his throat...was injured... He lost...his voice."  
  
"It...wa...fu...you..."  
  
Laguna went to a knee beside him. "Say again?"  
  
"It...was...fun...you...guys...La...guna...Ki...ros...It...was...fun..."  
  
"Ward, that's way uncool," Laguna said. "It's not cool to say things like that. Just for that, you're gettin' the Cuchi-Cuchi treatment!" He tickled Ward under the arms, then stood up. "How's that, huh!? Want more!? Well!?"  
  
Ward was silent, he had lost consciousness.  
  
Laguna turned and looked over the side of the cliff, and for the first time noticed the three boats floating at the bottom in an inlet. "WHOA!!! Check it out, a boat! We're gettin' on!"  
  
"A...vessel..." Kiros corrected, struggling to stay awake. It wasn't easy. "...They'd...normally...call...it..."  
  
"Boat, vessel, whatever!" Laguna said. "We're going back to Galbadia!" He pulled Kiros up, then shoved him off the side. A second later, a large splash was heard. Then he pulled up Ward and shoved him off as well. A second, larger splash was heard. He then walked over to the edge and looked down. "You guys...sure have guts. You know how high this cliff is...!?"  
  
He turned around to climb down slowly, but then slipped and fell backwards off the side. "Oh...sh...! ...No way... AHHHH!!!"  
  
There was a third splash, arguably the biggest.  
  
To Be Continued... 


End file.
